Rev. Robin Renteria, Ph.D.
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Robin Renteria, (919) 818-6362, Robin@RobinRenteria.com, uuweddingminister.com
If love is the answer.
could you rephrase the question?
~ Lily Tomlin
I'm now booking through Spring 2011
Contact me for a free consultation at 919-818-6362 or
I'll reply within 24 hours of receiving it.
(919) 818-6362
Leah and Mike's Wedding
What officiant services do you provide?
I offer civil, spiritual, interfaith, and non-denomination wedding ceremonies for heterosexual and same sex couples. I also offer memorial services and funeral services that are celebrations of the life for your loved one, baby blessings and christenings, house blessings, and pet memorials, all in your language of faith and tradition. I love these special moments of honoring the love we share and have known in our lives.
Do you have a sound system?
Yes! I have a portable battery operated sound system that I can take it to any venue for amplifying my and your voices. You can also plug in a CD or MP3 player into my amplifier (a Roland Cube Street amplifier). If there is electricity at the venue, I use my Samson Concert 77 wireless headset omnidirectional microphone which will also pick up the bride and groom's voices nearby. I have a wired microphone on a stand for other speakers/readers. If there is no electricity at the venue, I use a wired lapel microphone, and you and the readers use a wired microphone on a stand. NOTE: it's your responsibility to provide extension cords.
Are you willing to perform a ceremony at a non-religious site?
I officiate weddings in whatever setting you choose - homes, churches, gardens, museums (including the butterfly room), gazebos, estates, lakes, beaches, the Old Well at UNC, on a mountain top, at resorts or hotels, or in snowy woods. They are all lovely.
What is your attire for the ceremony?
I have different attire that's possible and leave the choice up to the couple. I have ministerial robes in black and white for those who want to honor the religious role of the minister, or I can wear a black dress, off white suit, and other garb for those who want a different look. Also I love color, so I try to match the colors of the wedding. I have pictures you can choose from.
Are you flexible in the wording used throughout the ceremony, including the vows?
Totally. I welcome your ideas. You choose and approve every word that is said. I marry couples of many different beliefs, and I believe your ceremony honor your love in your own way. I've been building a compendium of resources over the last15 years of choices for every aspect of a ceremony. I provide my book to you as part of my services. We use your preferences in that, your ideas, our conversations about your love, to create a ceremony that is uniquely yours.
Can we write our own vows, if we want to?
Absolutely! I have examples to show you if you'd like, and a guide to help you write your own from scratch. You can also say spontaneous words from your heart. Sometimes each person in the couple writes their vow and I hold it for them until the ceremony. Sometimes couples write love letters to each other that they read in the ceremony. In a traditional ceremony, you only speak to each other during your exchange of vows and rings. I encourage you to express your love to each other in many different ways in the ceremony. The moment will go quickly. Make it your own.
Do you have a list of readings?
I have a list of over 100 readings and addresses drawn from ancient and modern wisdom, poetry from all over the world, religiouse and secular sources. I also welcome new choices that you bring to me. I have the work of Pablo Neruda, Maya Angelou, Rumi, the Bible, Thich Nhat Hanh, Wendell Berry, Dr. Suess, The Velveteen Rabbit, and many more. I keep adding to my collection of romantic, thoughtful, loving and light spirited ways to celebrate the paths of love and marriage.
How long are your ceremonies?
My ceremonies usually last 15 to 20 minutes long depending on the elements you choose for your ceremony. I caution you from making a ceremony so short that it's over before you know it, or so long that it become repetitious or your guests wilt in the summer heat. I've also done ceremonies for couples which flow nicely that are 40 minutes long. I create a script for us to review so that you can see if it honors your needs. If you choose, I tailor the whole ceremony to you.
Do you require that premarital counseling be done?
I don't require premarital counseling. I do offer and recommend marriage enrichment that will benefit you at any point in your marriage. I use several approaches: www.Prepare-Enrich.com to help couples assess their areas of strength and build upon areas where growth is needed; Les and Leslie Parrot's, 'How To Save your Marriage Before It Starts,' Gary Chapman's 'The 5 Love Languages', the work of Harvel Hendricks, and more. I want you to have resources that will serve you all your lives.
Are you willing to conduct rehearsals?
Absolutely! I also help you assess your need for a rehearsal. I do rehearsals the day or evening before, or the day of the ceremony. Whether you have a rehearsal or not, I ensure that I understand your vision for your ceremony so that everything will go smoothly. At the rehearsal we set the tone for calm centered on your love. A wedding ceremony is ritual, not performance. It will be full of those small surprises that arise and make good stories. In the rehearsal we practice all of the formalities of your ceremony. Every detail is covered.
What sets me apart?
As a seminary educated ordained minister, I've been writing ritual and officiating at rites of passage for over 15 years. Thinking in ritual language and exploring the many different ways of expressing our deepest emotions is something I enjoy and treasure. I've studied the wisdom of the world's religions, as well as those secular philosophers and writers who seem to speak right to our hearts and souls. I respect them all and I have a wealth of resources upon which to draw.
I've been a hospital chaplain and am sensitive to the many emotional needs that arise.
I also attend to the details and pitch in to help as needed.
Most of all I come to your wedding fully present to your needs. I am happy in my own life, which enables me to be happy in yours.
Frequently Asked Questions (and Tips)
I love your questions. If you don't see the answer you need, please let me know. If I don't know, we'll figure it out together.
As a UU minister, a wedding minister, a wedding officiant, or a wedding celebrant I primarily serve the NC Triangle and the eastern NC Triad: Orange, Durham, Wake, Chatham, Alamance, Guilford, Person, and Johnston counties and the towns of Chapel Hill, Carrboro, Durham, Raleigh, Hillsborough, Cary, Mebane, Holly Springs, Fuquay Varina, Apex, Bahama, Burlington, Efland, and Greensboro. I welcome other requests and will honor them as time permits.
